We get, Citadel. You’re gross.
I don’t really want to think about eating food after watching Jorah’s grayscale ooze, and yet, here we are. My friend, Kelly Bittner, suggested roasting marshmallows this week for the crusty grayscale look.
Definitely a good suggestion, and one I might take up down the road if we see grayscale again—and, we might, considering Sam shared rum with a dude infected with it and kept touching his glove to his mouth. Maybe in the restricted section they have a book that says, I dunno, don’t do that?
I was more inspired by the pus coming out of Jorah’s wounds, so I decided to make a delicious lemon curd. Lemon curd can’t stand on its own, so thankfully, my boo, Hotpie, came back to tie this recipe together with all sorts of tips about browning the butter before making the pie crust. He explained that most people don’t brown the butter first because of all the extra time it takes—he’s right. It does take a lot of extra time. But, if Hotpie says to brown the butter, I’m going to brown the butter.
While a lemon curd brown-butter pie is certainly conceptual enough, I wanted to take this train a stop further. I can’t stop thinking about the one-eyed giant with the blue eye from the season premier. Was that future Wun-Wun? My heart can’t take it if it was. Tim Paluch said that he listened to a blog that said the reason why they focused on the blue-eyed giant so much is because Bran will eventually warg into him. I don’t necessarily think I buy into that theory, but I want it to be true. More giants, more dragons, more direwolves. True or not, we’re going to give a nod to that blue-eyed giant by making a blueberry compote today.
Oozy Lemon Curd and Blueberry Brown Butter Hotpies
Brown Butter Crust Recipe adapted from thee Martha Stewart
1 stick butter
1 ¼ cup flour
Take one stick of unsalted butter and melt on medium-low, stirring occasionally. Cook for about 7-10 minutes, until butter separates, foams, and has a nutty aroma. Take off heat and let cool for a few minutes. Pour into ice cube tray, about halfway, and freeze for at least an hour and a half.
In a food processor, pulse together 1 ¼ c of flour with a pinch of salt. Add frozen butter and pulse for about a minute. Pour into bowl. Add about 3 tbsp ice water (I wound up need more) and form into two balls. Refrigerate for several hours before using.
Filling recipes adapted from Vanilla and Bean
¾ cup fresh blueberries
1 tbsp. high quality maple syrup
½ tsp cornstarch
1 tsp. lemon zest
Egg, for wash
Fun fact, Adam made lemon curd from scratch, and I dropped it on the floor. You can also buy pre-made lemon curd, which is still pretty good.
In a small saucepan, heat blueberries on medium low for about a minute. Add remaining ingredients. As the blueberries start to release juices, use a fork to mash down about half of the berries. Remove from heat and refrigerate for about an hour.
Preheat oven to 375.
Roll out the dough and use a large glass to cut out circles. Put about a tablespoon of blueberry compote on top of the bottom circle and top with some lemon curd. So oozy!
Press edges down with a fork and cut slits in the top with a knife or Needle. Brush with egg wash. Bake for about 20 minutes.
I kind of like / don’t like how quickly this season is moving. I know that there aren’t many episodes left, and they have to hit all the major plot points, but I think that things feel a little rushed to me. For that reason, I think that Jon will already make it to Dragonstone, Robin’s gonna die, and Euron will already make his way back to Cirsei. Those are some bold predictions, I know. Let’s here what some other folks think is going to happen.
Tim Paluch’s Bold Prediction: In week 3 of Sam’s Citadel Gross-out Tales, there’s a 15-minute bloody vomit scene where Sam keeps slipping and falling in it, while maesters point and laugh.
Phil Schriver’s Bold Prediction: The dragons bring avian flu to Westeros.
Adam Holt’s Bold Prediction: Steve Bannon is going to show up in the Citadel sick ward. Will they ever cure his puffy skin rash disease?
Josh Dreyer’s Bold Prediction: Drogon rebels against his mother and convinces the other two dragons to get matching ‘Death from Above’ tattoos.
Well, those were pretty good predictions. I didn’t use my wolf cookie cutter this week, but believe me, I will. So glad Nymeria’s back. I love dogs, you guys.